


Home is Where We Love

by Emejig16



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Parents, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-02-16 20:51:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13061919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emejig16/pseuds/Emejig16
Summary: A mini snippet into the lives of Dan and Phil Howell-Lester and their children.





	Home is Where We Love

The dusty attic was Phil’s least favorite place in their whole home. The creaky wood and smell that could only be described as time permeated his senses as he pushed through the old pieces of furniture and many boxes. Since getting married and starting their family, they’d moved twice, and all of the excess items had ended up boxed away. Phil had come up here in search of memories. All of the albums they’d collected over the years had somehow ended up hidden away from the bustle of life. Phil sneezed as he opened the box labeled “Albums”, ‘keep away from water”. The dim lighting of the attic flickered off as he carried the box down the stairs.

Nearly a whole year had gone by since Phil last scrapbooked. His work as one of the main developers for the media company he worked for had kept him more than busy. Same with their children: Kayla, their eleven year old daughter, and Madison (who preferred to go by his middle name, Xander), their eight year old son. They ran his life in a good way. If you were to look through his iPhoto library all you would find were hundreds of pictures of them spanning over the last six years.

He sighed as he walked into the empty kitchen. It was strange to think that five hours ago this very room was bustling with movement. Dan was flipping pancakes, Kayla was insisting that her sandwich in her lunch be a peanut butter and nutella, while Xander tugged at his jeans asking him for help with tying his shoes. Although they were hectic, school day mornings were his favorite time. Actually, that might have been dinner when they were all together, but he digressed. Those mornings just felt like what it meant to be a family: everyone together in one area, occasionally bumping into each other, but smiling and brushing it off, quick kisses and tight hugs;he lived for it.

Phil set the box down with a heavy thud. He walked over to the sink and washed his hands, before grabbing a flannel to get down to work. He wiped the dust off of every single one of the albums and set them down neatly. He was just about to wipe the last one and set it down with a second thought when he smiled softly. The first album he’d ever made was currently in his palm. This was the one that contained their first house together, and the adoption of Kayla and then Xander. He let his fingers run over the glossy page that held a copy of the adoption forms.

He kept flipping through remembering the stressful days of having to detangle Kayla’s wavy light brown hair, and making sure she didn’t cut her baby brother’s curly dark brown hair. Gosh, even as a baby Xander had the cutest little freckles across his cheeks and nose. Phil’s not sure how much he means it but he does miss these days often. If he could relive them he would but moving forward was also a great thing too.

Life worked in such mysterious ways. The first time he held Dan’s hand, he would have never guessed they would have made it this far together. Not that he was saying he thought they were doomed from the start, but it was astonishing. A slightly wistful smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he thought about their journey as parents.

Of course, like any parents Dan and Phil weren’t perfect. They argued about which parenting technique was the best or whether or not they were being too lenient or too strict but as all of these scrapbooks show, it was all trial and error that formed a beautiful collage.

Thinking back, Phil figured the reason why they kept feeling unsure of their moves was because they had always envisioned themselves doing things differently. They wanted to have an open house where no topic was off limits and their children wouldn’t be afraid to share their thoughts, and things they didn’t understand. They just wanted their kids to grow up knowing they’d always be right there when their children needed them most.

Dan and Phil just hadn’t realized there were just some things that they just could not escape when it came to the pitfalls of parenting. The first challenge was understanding personality differences. From the first few weeks of adopting Kayla and Xander they noted that the two children were polar opposites. Kayla was talkative, outspoken and independent, whereas Madison (Xander) was very shy, quiet and clung to them more often. Phil had said that it was the age difference and that with time Madison would probably open up, but Dan insisted that he was looking far too much into it and that Madison was fine the way he was (not that Phil had ever once said anything about it not being fine).

Phil chuckled at the thought of their earlier days. He’d gladly relive them all over again. He supposed that’s why he was now. There was no such thing as a boring day in the Howell-Lester household. Sometimes all he needed to do was sit back and take a moment to breathe and look at how far they’ve come, and how much farther they will go as family.

As for right now, reminiscing was over. Now, it was time for him to start getting afternoon snacks in order and start thinking about dinner plan. Shortly, it would be helping with homework, hearing about what was done today, and many more things.

-

“Papa! Papa! Papa!” Kayla squealed as she burst through the door. Dan trailed behind holding firmly onto Xander’s hand.

“Hey ladybug whatcha’ got there?” Phil asked crouching down to give her a hug.

“We painted in art class today! And, and, and I made this!” she exclaimed holding up the painting. It was a crude forest scene with a lot of potential with a bit more practice and art tips. It was clear as day that she was passionate about art.

“Wow! This is awesome. Did you trace any of this?” Phil asked skeptically.

“None of it actually. I did this all by myself.” Kayla replied matter of factly. “See, this is why I need new art supplies!” she sassed as she walked on past her Papa and to the stairs to her room. Phil shook his head playfully as he walked towards Dan and Xander.

“Hey sweetheart,” Dan greeted giving Phil a peck on the cheek. “How was your day?”

“Oh you know, just quiet. Got some good work done around the house as you can see.” Phil said gesturing to the freshly vacuumed floors, neatly arranged shoes, lack of loose paperwork and just general tidiness.

“Oh, I like. Is someone trying to get on my really good side? Maybe trying to make sure I don’t have a lot of extra work to do tonight…” Dan replied with an eyebrow raise as he removed his coat.

Phil chuckled, “I guess we’ll see.” He turned his attention to Xander who was quietly placing his shoes in line with the others. “Hey bud, have a good day at school today?”

Xander nodded with a smile, “We started learning times tables today.”

“Impressive.” Phil responded.

“What’s one times three?” Dan asked.

“Uh…three.” Xander replied quietly.

“Good job bud! We can practice them more later tonight.” Dan said, watching has Xander walked towards the kitchen to get a snack.

“I take it all is well at the theatre?” Phil asked.

“I mean work is work. Someone is always going to have something to complain about and criticize the way I would like to run things, but there’s not much I can do about it.” Dan said with a shrug.

“Darn,” Phil responded.

“But it’s whatever, I’ll get started on dinner if you do homework tonight,” Dan proposed, already walking towards the kitchen.

“Sounds good.”

-

The evening moved slowly with a bit of free time before basic multiplication flashcards, going over spelling words, brainstorming ideas for new projects, and working on practicing cursive. While most parents found this to be daunting and chose not to do it, both Dan and Phil gained the most satisfaction out of helping their children with their schoolwork. School wasn’t always easy and every child handled the work differently; both felt it was important to make sure they kept up to date with what was being learned.

It was the little things that instilled confidence into children and made them more likely to pursue their dreams and know that their parents always had their back. Growing up sucked and to Dan and Phil, it was their jobs as parents to facilitate and be a present force without pushing.

“Madison Xander, eat your carrots,” Dan reprimanded, watching as he pushed them around on his plate.

He pouted, “Okay.”

“They’re not even that bad. Dad could have made peas and that would have been so much worse,” Kayla chimed in with a mischievous giggle.

“Watch it young lady, or tomorrow’s dinner might be nothing but just peas,” Phil added, giggling himself.

“Oh yes that sounds like a wonderful idea! I can see it now: Pea soup, pea milkshake, a literal bowl of peas, pea flavored ice-cream–”

“Gross!” Kayla exclaimed, making a face.

“Icky!” Xander agreed.

Dan and Phil looked at each other and laughed. They had the best children in the world with such authentic personalities. Sometimes Dan wondered how they would have developed had they stayed in foster care. They were truly a blessing and made even the worst of days so much brighter.

“But seriously eat your carrots buddy.” Phil said a bit more seriously.

“But Papa…” Xander whined.

“No buts. If you finish your carrots then you can have a cookie before bed.” Dan finished for Phil.

“Deal.” Xander said shoving a fork full of carrots into his mouth.

-

The day was starting to wind down. The early night consisted of making sure all schoolwork got tucked away into folders and packed back into backpacks, pencils sharpened, and other supplies back in their respective places. It was also time for showers, teeth brushing, and about an extra hour or so until bedtime.

“I received an email from Xander’s teacher.” Dan commented as he did the washing up.

“Yeah I got the same one; the one regarding his participation in class,” Phil clarified.

“Mhmm. She says she knows he’s understanding the material when she asks him and gives little proficiency tests, but he doesn’t like to participate in class,” Dan explained.

“Some students are just more shy than others in social settings.” Phil responding, realizing he never actually finished reading the entire email.

“She thinks it would be best for him to see a counselor,”

“I mean I don’t think he needs one though? He talks plenty at home and when he plays with his friends? Why is she suggesting that he might have some sort of social anxiety?” Phil said, leaning against the counter.

“Hard to say. I think she just wants to make sure everything is alright. She doesn’t know him as well as we do but rather by what he does in class. In the end it’s up to us.” Dan conceded.

“I guess you’re right. Don’t we have a meeting with her coming up soon?” Phil asked.

“Yeah in about two weeks,” Dan confirmed.

“Well I don’t think we need to worry about it now. We’ll see what she says then.” Phil concluded.

Dan supposed there were always decisions to be made and it was best not to jump into them too quickly. He was just worried that maybe there was a legit problem that he was missing, and waiting would only cause the problem to worsen.

“Well, I’m just going to make sure the kids are in bed.” Phil said with a yawn.

As he walked up the stairs the light streaming from the bottom of Kayla’s door caught his eye. She was usually asleep by now, or at least would have turned off the lights. Phil knocked on her door before opening it.

“It’s nearly 10:30 ladybug,” Phil said standing in the doorframe. Kayla was sitting at her desk, busy shading with her pencil.

“Yeah I know, I was just finishing up some sketches.” she responded.

“Oh can I take a look?” Phil asked with curiosity.

“Not yet, they’re not quite done yet. Maybe this weekend when they’re done,” Kayla responded trying to hide her embarrassment. It wasn’t that she wasn’t proud of her art, it was just that this was something she just did. She didn’t expect her parents to be interested in it.

“Alright do you pinky promise?” Phil asked walking over to her.

“Yep,” she said with a smile as she wrapped her pinky around her father’s. “Hey can you braid my hair for me? You know the french braid style? I still can’t figure out how to do it.”

“Yeah sure,” Phil said with a sheepish smile. He picked up her comb and detangled her hair. As he sectioned her hair he couldn’t help but remember when Louise taught him how to do this. He had dropped Kayla over at her flat for a playdate with Darcy, and Louise had styled Kayla’s hair for her and she absolutely loved it. He was just commenting on how nice it was when Louise offered to show him how to do it for her.

“So you really like art huh?” Phil commented as he braided.

“Yeah I do,” She replied shyly. “I just think it’s cool and I hope to one day be really good at it.”

“That’s a great attitude to have to have. You should always hold onto the things you enjoy. Don’t allow anyone to tell you otherwise.”

“Alright Papa,” She agreed, while handing him an elastic to tie the end with.

“Alright now get in bed so papa can tuck you in,” Phil said stepping away from the chair.

“Papa I’m eleven, almost twelve! I don’t need you tuck me in every night,” she said playfully as walked over to her bed, before climbing into her teal polka dot bed sheets.

“I know but I want to,” Phil said with a fond smile, looking at the neat French braid he’d done.

“Goodnight Papa,” she said sitting up to give him a hug.

“Night ladybug.” Phil said kissing her forehead.

-

Meanwhile, Dan was peeking into Xander’s room, making sure he was fast asleep, which he was. He nearly jumped when Phil came by and stood next to him in the doorway.

“All good?” Phil whispered.

“Yep; he’s out. How about Kayla?” Dan asked, quietly shutting Xander’s door.

“Well she wasn’t asleep yet because she was drawing, but she’s good.” Phil said as they walked in the direction of their room.

“She’s really passionate about art huh?” Dan mused.

“More than she’d like us to know,” Phil added.

“We should get her more art stuff for her birthday,” Dan proposed.

“I agree.” Phil replied.

“Are you heading off to bed now?” Dan asked.

“Not just yet,” Phil replied vaguely. “I brought down a lot of our old albums and was going to take a look through them.”

“You ventured all the way up to the attic by yourself?” Dan teased, as he followed Phil down the hall.

“Yes; I am capable of doing things that seem scary. I mean, I got married to you and bought a house with you?” Phil commented, mostly joking.

“Rude?” Dan responded unsure of how to take that comment.

“I was kidding, but you have to be lying to me and yourself if you’re trying to tell me you didn’t have a single bit of fear in you as we took all of these strides,” Phil argued.

“Yeah you’re right.” Dan agreed. “But a little risk goes a long way.”

“I can’t argue with that,”

“Anyways, I’m going to take a shower now.” Dan said starting to head in the direction of their room.

“Okay, I’m going to be downstairs for a while.” Phil said as he walked down the stairs.

Phil sighed as he got himself a glass of water. His eyes drifted over to the flicker of the lamppost outside before he drew the blinds shut. He knew that he should go upstairs and go to bed, but he couldn’t help but be drawn to the maroon, navy blue, white, and bright yellow albums that stuck out of the top of the box they were in, begging to be opened and felt once again.

Phil picked up the white album and sat down. He smiled fondly as he opened the oldest album–their wedding album, Why he had chosen this one he’s not sure, but it humbled him to see how far they’ve come together: from being a pair of lovebirds to husbands and most importantly parents.

He knew for a fact that the two people in front of him, shoving a piece of cake in each other’s faces would have never guessed that this was the future they had dreamed of–The one they mused about late that night. Sometimes he really wondered how the universe did what it did. He closed the album and set it down, and leaned back in his chair. He really needed to scrapbook more often. He didn’t want to forget any of those easily forgotten moments in life. He wanted Kayla and Xander to one day come looking, and be astonished by their growth and most importantly his own documentation. Time chugs on, but it’s secretly flying and all four of them were coasting along the currents. Phil reached for the maroon album next to get lost in.

“You’re still up?” Dan mumbled with a yawn. After he’d gotten out of the shower and noticed Phil wasn’t in bed already, he decided he’d just go and see what he was up to downstairs.

“Oh yeah, I was just looking at some albums, and just thinking.” Phil commented as he flipped through another page.

Dan smiled fondly and sat down at the table with Phil. The dim glow of the light overhead reflected off of the shiny pages. The colorful papers loaded with various stickers spelling out names and events warmed his heart. They looked at all of the crude drawings Kayla had drawn of them, of their family, the house, and other workings of her imagination. The two of them let out soft “aws” as they looked at some of the oldest photos they had of their children. Their hands were so small covered in paint, holding ice cream, and holding onto swingsets. Then there was the two of them holding both Xander and Kayla closely as they were dressed up for official tea parties, playing in the mud, and more recently beach trips.

Every single last photo was more than just a glossy sheet of paper. They were an immortalization of a feeling–togetherness, happiness, and acceptance. To think they had all of these memories and many more that will live on vividly in their hearts and minds was overwhelming. Life just moved so fast sometimes, and to think that it had zipped by them so fast, yet at the the time it seemed like the slowest moment was just so odd to think about.

“Mental right,” Phil mused with a smile.

“Time flies,” Dan commented fondly.

“We’ve been down here for two hours,” Phil said in agreement.

“Isn’t that impressive; we relived nearly six years worth of memories in two hours.” Dan giggled.

“I love your brain when it wanders,” Phil mumbled.

“Well I just love you. And everything that we’ve done together.” Dan said wrapping his arm around Phil.

Phil kissed Dan’s forehead, “Love you too.”

“Anyways, we should go to bed now.” Dan commented before kissing Phil’s cheek.

“Yeah I have work and so do you,” Phil said as he stood up and stretched.

“You’re making breakfast tomorrow, and I’ll take care of lunches,” Dan proposed as they switched off the lights downstairs. They made their way back up the stairs. The two parents double checked both Kayla and Xander’s rooms one last time to make sure they were still fast asleep.

The two parents got ready for bed themselves and got into bed. Tomorrow was another weekday, and if anything slightly more hectic because both Dan and Phil were working. As the two slowly drifted off to sleep, thoughts of tomorrow’s plans came to mind.

-

There was a soft knock on Dan and Phil’s bedroom door. The cool quiet night had barely just begun for the busy parents, but had been going on for much longer. Tonight was quiet with a soft touch drawing one far into sleep. It was strange to think that someone was awake at such a calm time. Honestly, Dan wasn’t sure if he had actually heard a knock but when the door to their room squeaked open, letting in a faint white glow of light, he was sure he was awake. He smiled to himself as he heard quiet footsteps behind the moving orb of light. Dan lifted his head a bit more so he could see which child had come in, although judging by the soft sniffles and short stature he figured it was their son.

“Xander?” Dan mumbled tiredly. He watched as the eight year old shuffled over his bedside. Dan sat up a bit more and shifted over so that Madison could hop on to the bed next to him. He wrapped his arm around him, pulling the small boy into his chest.

“What’s wrong bud?” Dan asked softly.

“Bad dream,” Xander mumbled, trying to burrow himself further into Dan’s arms.

“Oh I’m sorry,” Dan comforted, squeezing Xander slightly. “Do you want to tell me what the dream was about?”

“It was scary,” Xander said in his little voice. He sniffed again as he used the back of his hand to wipe away the tears that were starting to fall again. He didn’t want to think of that nightmare; he was terrified and convinced it was going to come true.

“Shh it’s okay Xands,” Dan said softly as he rubbed his back softly.

“Are you and Papa going to give me back?” Xander asked in between sniffles.

“Never in a million years. Where on Earth did you get that idea from?”

Xander shrugged and mumbled something Dan couldn’t quite hear as he played with Dan’s shirt.

Dan frowned, “Madison Xander…” he started, using his semi-authoritative tone. He knew there was something he wasn’t telling him. “Did something happen recently that you did not tell me or papa about?”

Xander nodded guiltily, “The boys in my class…. they said I was going to go back to the home because you guys didn’t want a fairy for a son, and in my dream you made me go back, but you kept Kayla.”

“Don’t listen to those meanies,” Dan said, angry with himself for not finding out this information sooner. He promised himself that when he was a parent he would always try to be updated with what was happening at school with his kids and their interactions with others.

“You won’t send me back?”

“I can promise you that you aren’t going anywhere.” Dan said pulling Xander into tight hug.

“Good cause I love you and Papa a lot.” Xander said softly.

“Do you want to sleep here?” Dan asked.

“No your room doesn’t have stars on the ceiling.” Xander stated softly.

“Alright, let’s go back to sleep buddy.” Dan said, as he lifted Xander, realizing that he’d grown to be much bigger than he actually noticed. He ended up setting him down just as they’d left his and Phil’s room. He looked down when he felt Xander grab his hand as they walked back down the hallway to his room. Maybe eight years old was too old to still be sucking his thumb, but he supposed that would be an issue to address later. He led Xander through the open doorway, and turned on the light.

“Can I go potty first?” Xander asked as let go of Dan’s hand.

“Yeah; remember to wash your hands.” Dan advised.

Once Xander came back, Dan tucked him back into bed. He handed him his favorite teddy that was on the floor and smiled at the way he cradled it. Dan leaned forward and kissed his forehead.

“Don’t listen to those meanies okay? They are only saying things to feel better about bad parts of their lives by making you sad too.” Dan said as he ran his hand through Xander’s curly hair.

“Okay,” Xander replied softly.

“Do you want me to stay here until you fall asleep?” Dan asked.

Xander nodded, and so Dan switched off the lights and laid himself down next to Xander. Luckily, he was only left staring at the green glowing stars and crescent moons above him for just about fifteen minutes, when he could hear Xander’s soft snores once again. He gingerly got onto his feet and left his room, pulling the door shut without waking him.

-

“Was that Xander?” Phil mumbled when he heard Dan shuffle back into bed.

“Yep,” Dan replied as he lifted the duvet and got under.

“Why what happened?” Phil asked, as he wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist, nuzzling into his shoulder.

“He had a bad dream. It was a dream where we put him back up from adoption, but not Kayla,” Dan explained.

“Really?” Phil asked with concern.

“Yeah, apparently the boys in his glass have been bullying him. They’ve been calling him a fairy, and probably worse, and saying that we didn’t want a fairy for a son.” Dan finished with a sigh.

“Do you think this has something to do with why Xander doesn’t feel comfortable speaking in class?” Phil questioned.

“I’m pretty sure it does. I’m going to see if we can bump up that meeting with his teacher to next week.” Dan said, grabbing his bag.

“Good idea. What are we going to do until then if it can’t be moved?” Phil asked.

Dan shrugged and chuckled, “Parent.”

“Well what do we do now?”

“Sleep and do it all again tomorrow.” Dan said with yawn.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was originally written and posted in April of 2016. 
> 
> Thank you to maetaurus for betaing.


End file.
